Sometimes we do things…

timthumbWhen your 16 everything, even the littlest thing seems so much more than it is…

From first kisses to goodbyes.

So why as we grow up do with loose those feelings? What I wouldn’t give to feel 16 again and experiencing love for the first time. To have all those feelings charging through my body all at once, pushing their way to the surface. To not feel so…

To not feel like that’s it, that for the next 50 years this is what I have…normal! From school runs to ballet lessons, from work to cosy nights in. There is nothing wrong with normal but then I didn’t get to feel 18, 19, hell even 20! I was with Nick from such a young age and he was a stay in, movie kind of guy and I never had university friends or girlie friends who wanted to go out. I know its bad, I know that thinking about this now will ultimately leave me feeling empty and miserable. I have two kids to think about and a husband. I can’t just wish the last 13 years of my life away!

See 13 years! That’s scary all by itself. I have friends who are 18/19 and I see them and I’m envious of the life they will lead. I tell them, look just party now and think about life later. I’m not the girl I was back then, I am but in a lot of ways I told myself I was okay with normal and easy and stable but what I was screaming for was exciting, dangerous and the complete opposite, what can I say I miss the drama in my life!

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